I
recently returned to Europe for a five-week break during the summer holidays.
Quite a few faux paus later, I realised just Sudan-ised I'd become in the last
10 months. Whallaiiiii!!!!! (note: some points may have been slightly
exaggerated)
- You annoy all your friends by turning up two hours late for EVERYTHING
- You keep shouting into your mobile phone even though the connection is good
- You greet everyone with “keyf, tamaam?” (how are you? Fine?) and become slightly confused when no-one understands
- You outrage shopkeepers by trying to negotiate the price
- Nightclub patrons look at you strangely when you start clicking your fingers at them to encourage their dancing
- You still can’t bring yourself to wear a halter-neck top
- You arrive at friends' houses and promptly fall asleep on the nearest bed/couch
- You still prefer to eat with your hand even at posh dinner parties
- You pre-fix every sentence with “wallai….” (literally: “I swear to God” or “really?”)
- You now prefer tea over beer/wine/vodka etc.
- You keep boring friends with conversations starters like “When I was in Sudan…”
- You keep wondering why no-one is noticing your existence anymore, in fact you’re even slightly disappointed when the marriage offers dry up
- You constantly laugh out loud at your own jokes and then attempt to shake people's hands afterwards
- You horrify everyone when you suggest making pasta sauce with peanut butter
- You're confused when the bus doesn't stop no matter how loud you click your fingers
- You half consider paying for the coffees and metro fares of random strangers
- You constantly wander in to your neighbour's house for a friendly chat without calling ahead first
- People think you're being aggressive when you greet them by whacking them on the shoulder
- You keep interrogating random people about their marital status
- After awhile, you even start missing fuul a bit