Those sunsets, sunsets ...

Even as I stood alone on my balcony in the fading light, there was no denying the intoxicating romance of the scene before me.

The muezzin sounded the evening call to prayer as the sun slipped behind the black silhouettes of the date palms lining the River Nile.

The sky lit up in a magnificent multi-hued explosion of pink and orange, reaching a riotous crescendo before disappearing altogether.

What Ed Damer lacks in attractions, it more than makes up for with some of the most jaw-dropping daily sunset displays I've ever seen.

I am suddenly reminded of a refrain from well-known Australian band Powderfinger’s hit track 'Sunsets'.

“Sunrise building a reprise in my heart

Regret tight around my chest plays its part

Watching the sunset, sunset over the beaches”

I never really thought of Sudan as being a place of romance. With its dusty, daily realities it seems more like a haven for the romantically bruised in self-imposed exile.

For all the relentless obsession about marriage, there is a detached reserve to relationships here, exacerbated perhaps by current economic hardships.

With many men now working away from home in Gulf countries, their wives remain behind as virtual single mothers and many will not see their husbands for months at a time, even years.

Even couples not separated by distance seem to live almost totally separate lives.

My friend's sister, currently recuperating with her family in Ed Damer after giving birth to a new son, informed me recently her husband is coming from Khartoum in the next days to visit “the baby” for the first time. Noticing her curious omission of “us”, I add quickly “And you; He's coming to see you too”. She stares at me blankly and shrugs her shoulders. 

Some Sudanese men approach the concept with an almost teenage naivety, often expressed by spontaneous marriage proposals and poetic declarations of love in the first meeting.

Strict social segregation and a matter-of-fact approach to marriage means there is less opportunity for relationships to develop naturally. 

When it comes to marriage, there are also vastly different attitudes and cultural norms. While in the West we may idealise the concept of romantic love and finding 'The One', in Sudan this is often considered secondary to financial security and family duty.

Scratch beneath the surface, however, and Sudan does in fact have its own romantic side.

It’s there in the hidden love affairs, kept secret even from closest friends and family; it’s there in a stolen moment in a public place, the press of a handshake, slightly longer than is usual, the young couples sat at the back of a restaurant staring coyly into each other’s eyes – their fruit juices remaining forgotten in front of them.

Watching the magical Ed Damer sunsets have another quality: the seductive romance of home as viewed from far away.

I think of another time and another place, watching the sun set over a beach before slipping effortlessly behind the horizon.

I wonder what home will be like when I go back. Perhaps it will be just like falling in love all over again …